So I recently read a blog where a man defended his wife for being a stay-at-home mom. As I was reading it, I kept thinking to myself, good for him! Then, as I thought more about it, I started to think about the blog itself. Sure, this blog and others talk about how we stay-at-home moms are raising our children and bringing them up to be productive members of society, but they never really seem to answer the question of what we do all day.
Before I had kids, I never thought I'd be a stay-at-home mom. I often worked well in excess of 40 hours per week and worked on most weekends. I often wondered what it is I would do all day as a stay-at-home mom and if I'd get bored. Shortly after my daughter was born, I was laid off due to downsizing so I got the chance to prove myself wrong. I was now going to be a stay-at-home mom, and as my mom always used to tell my sister and me, "You are my job. And I always do my jobs well."
I now have two kids and couldn't imagine working outside the home. I am very fortunate and grateful that I can stay home with my kids, and that we can get by on my husband's salary. But staying at home with the kids is a lot of work in and of itself. Each day with the kids is different, and we do have the days where everything runs like clockwork. But then we have the other day; the days where all you want to do is change your name from mom to anything else. This doesn't mean that we don't love our children or our job as a stay-at-home mom; it just means that it's been a long day.
Each day I work hard to prepare 3 healthy meals for my kids. This is often difficult when your child gets on a kick where they want the same food over and over and over, but that's when you use your negotiation skills to get them to eat the apple slices along with their peanut butter sandwich. And yes, there are the days where I am a "horrible" parent, and I take my kids to eat fast food while we are out running errands. For the most part though, we plan our meals so that we can eat at home most days and nights.
I also spend a lot of time cleaning the house. This doesn't mean that my house is spotless, it just means that I can let my son crawl around without worrying that he'll put food that fell off the table a week ago in his mouth. Now that my daughter is older, she gets to help me with the cleaning, sometimes as punishment but mostly as something she does as a member of this family. I'm usually cleaning the same things multiple times throughout the day: the pantry and the CD/DVDs. My son knows how to open the CD/DVD storage on our entertainment center as well as the pantry and so his favorite things to do are to pull everything out and spread them across the floor. Sounds like fun, right? And the best part, there is no way (at least that we've figured out) to baby-proof either without ruining the furniture piece - so I clean.
Then there are the millions of other things that stay-at-home moms do everyday, like bandaging scrapes, stopping arguments, and teaching the kids new things. My kids are kind of clumsy, so there really isn't a day that goes by where one of them doesn't need a little TLC for some new bump or bruise. Even if dad is home, when someone gets hurt, they want mom. It usually only takes a minute or two to get them to stop screaming like a banshee, but it takes a minute or two of undivided attention.
Then there's the countless number of times in a day where you are telling your kids, "don't climb on your brother," "share your toys," "no spitting," "don't jump off the coffee table," etc. I know what you may be thinking, "your kids must be terribly misbehaved." No, my kids are normal kids. I have an 11 month old boy who chases his 3 year old sister around the house. They are both active and curious about the world around them, and they are both so full of energy that it wears me out most days. I am grateful though that for as much as they misbehave at home, they are very sweet and polite children outside of the home.
During our day, we also take some time to do something fun and educational. That may be something as simple as learning a new song or something as complex as making a puzzle. Now you may be thinking, a jumbo puzzle with only 24 pieces isn't that complex. But think about it from a toddler's standpoint. Their mindset is that each piece fits into the next so long as you bang on it hard enough, and if it doesn't fit, then I'll just give up and leave the puzzle strewn across the floor. We have even attempted to do those random Pinterest posts for kid's crafts. They never seem to turn out as cool looking as they do in the photos though, but it is the fun of doing something with the kids.
My favorite thing though is the daily conversations I have with my daughter, and eventually will have with my son. There's the easy questions that I love like "can I have some drink please?" and "what are we going to do today?" And then there are the hard questions that philosophers are still debating like "where is Heaven?" to the questions about science, "why do we have frost?" You can answer the questions if you can get a word in, that is. And surely, halfway through your answer, you get a "what is that" or yet another "why" question. There's no teacher's guide to help you answer these questions. Sure you have the Internet, but that is typically too slow in finding an answer or at least an answer that will satisfy their curiousity.
Many times, we have these days without showers, grown-up interaction, and breaks. If I don't get up early enough, there is no way I can take a shower. I can quickly put on deodorant and brush my teeth, but outside of those activities, there's no time. The kids are already off and running a muck! If we do get grown-up interaction, it is very brief and to the point as we have to stop one child from falling off the top of the slide while pushing the other on the swings at the playground. If you are lucky enough to have kids who nap, consider yourself blessed. Those are precious moments where you have a second to hear yourself think and can maybe sit down with a drink or a book or lunch some days. My 3 year old naps maybe once a week and I'm always so excited when it happens to coincide with my son's nap (yes, I said nap - singular; he doesn't want to miss out on anything).
So what do I do all day? Simply put, I take care of my kids, my husband, the dog, and our house. The long of it is that I diaper, dress, bathe, cook, clean, bandage, comfort, multi-task, negotiate, manage conflicts, answer questions, do crafts, play games, make puzzles, and the list goes on and on. I love being a stay-at-home mom. One day I will venture back into the workplace, but for now, there is no place that I would rather be.
Before I had kids, I never thought I'd be a stay-at-home mom. I often worked well in excess of 40 hours per week and worked on most weekends. I often wondered what it is I would do all day as a stay-at-home mom and if I'd get bored. Shortly after my daughter was born, I was laid off due to downsizing so I got the chance to prove myself wrong. I was now going to be a stay-at-home mom, and as my mom always used to tell my sister and me, "You are my job. And I always do my jobs well."
I now have two kids and couldn't imagine working outside the home. I am very fortunate and grateful that I can stay home with my kids, and that we can get by on my husband's salary. But staying at home with the kids is a lot of work in and of itself. Each day with the kids is different, and we do have the days where everything runs like clockwork. But then we have the other day; the days where all you want to do is change your name from mom to anything else. This doesn't mean that we don't love our children or our job as a stay-at-home mom; it just means that it's been a long day.
Each day I work hard to prepare 3 healthy meals for my kids. This is often difficult when your child gets on a kick where they want the same food over and over and over, but that's when you use your negotiation skills to get them to eat the apple slices along with their peanut butter sandwich. And yes, there are the days where I am a "horrible" parent, and I take my kids to eat fast food while we are out running errands. For the most part though, we plan our meals so that we can eat at home most days and nights.
I also spend a lot of time cleaning the house. This doesn't mean that my house is spotless, it just means that I can let my son crawl around without worrying that he'll put food that fell off the table a week ago in his mouth. Now that my daughter is older, she gets to help me with the cleaning, sometimes as punishment but mostly as something she does as a member of this family. I'm usually cleaning the same things multiple times throughout the day: the pantry and the CD/DVDs. My son knows how to open the CD/DVD storage on our entertainment center as well as the pantry and so his favorite things to do are to pull everything out and spread them across the floor. Sounds like fun, right? And the best part, there is no way (at least that we've figured out) to baby-proof either without ruining the furniture piece - so I clean.
Then there are the millions of other things that stay-at-home moms do everyday, like bandaging scrapes, stopping arguments, and teaching the kids new things. My kids are kind of clumsy, so there really isn't a day that goes by where one of them doesn't need a little TLC for some new bump or bruise. Even if dad is home, when someone gets hurt, they want mom. It usually only takes a minute or two to get them to stop screaming like a banshee, but it takes a minute or two of undivided attention.
Then there's the countless number of times in a day where you are telling your kids, "don't climb on your brother," "share your toys," "no spitting," "don't jump off the coffee table," etc. I know what you may be thinking, "your kids must be terribly misbehaved." No, my kids are normal kids. I have an 11 month old boy who chases his 3 year old sister around the house. They are both active and curious about the world around them, and they are both so full of energy that it wears me out most days. I am grateful though that for as much as they misbehave at home, they are very sweet and polite children outside of the home.
During our day, we also take some time to do something fun and educational. That may be something as simple as learning a new song or something as complex as making a puzzle. Now you may be thinking, a jumbo puzzle with only 24 pieces isn't that complex. But think about it from a toddler's standpoint. Their mindset is that each piece fits into the next so long as you bang on it hard enough, and if it doesn't fit, then I'll just give up and leave the puzzle strewn across the floor. We have even attempted to do those random Pinterest posts for kid's crafts. They never seem to turn out as cool looking as they do in the photos though, but it is the fun of doing something with the kids.
My favorite thing though is the daily conversations I have with my daughter, and eventually will have with my son. There's the easy questions that I love like "can I have some drink please?" and "what are we going to do today?" And then there are the hard questions that philosophers are still debating like "where is Heaven?" to the questions about science, "why do we have frost?" You can answer the questions if you can get a word in, that is. And surely, halfway through your answer, you get a "what is that" or yet another "why" question. There's no teacher's guide to help you answer these questions. Sure you have the Internet, but that is typically too slow in finding an answer or at least an answer that will satisfy their curiousity.
Many times, we have these days without showers, grown-up interaction, and breaks. If I don't get up early enough, there is no way I can take a shower. I can quickly put on deodorant and brush my teeth, but outside of those activities, there's no time. The kids are already off and running a muck! If we do get grown-up interaction, it is very brief and to the point as we have to stop one child from falling off the top of the slide while pushing the other on the swings at the playground. If you are lucky enough to have kids who nap, consider yourself blessed. Those are precious moments where you have a second to hear yourself think and can maybe sit down with a drink or a book or lunch some days. My 3 year old naps maybe once a week and I'm always so excited when it happens to coincide with my son's nap (yes, I said nap - singular; he doesn't want to miss out on anything).
So what do I do all day? Simply put, I take care of my kids, my husband, the dog, and our house. The long of it is that I diaper, dress, bathe, cook, clean, bandage, comfort, multi-task, negotiate, manage conflicts, answer questions, do crafts, play games, make puzzles, and the list goes on and on. I love being a stay-at-home mom. One day I will venture back into the workplace, but for now, there is no place that I would rather be.
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